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ACE in your god damn face.
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| i'm coming out of my cage and i've been doing just fine. |
[02 May 2006|02:43am] |
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i knew playing the who can drive who to the furthest point physically before the other person wants to jump off a cliff and die of frustration game so often in my past would eventually come in handy. i'm pretty sure i'm the reigning champion of that one. what a fun and hilarious night.
i'm so happy i kind of want to flip all over my house and do the hip-shaking dance that fits perfectly to that killers song. you know the one. but i'm physically drained and too tired to get off my couch. still, i'm oozing happiness.
i haven't really felt like this since i was sixteen.
eeeep.
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[21 Apr 2006|02:20pm] |
i got a job.
go ahead, take another look at the username and picture and make sure you can fully wrap your mind around the fact that i, alyssa nicole, am indeed writing this.
i got a fucking job.
hahaha. clearly,
i'm the man.
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| 8th and ocean? gay. |
[05 Apr 2006|11:57pm] |
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tv! |
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hi. i just won $100 at bingo. this makes me happy. spicy chicken sandwiches, cuddling on couches, watching tv all night, and the red sox winning all make me an even happier girl. what a good day and night. haven't had that combination in awhile. the alcohol thing is going pretty well too. i'm proud of myself and my body feels so much better. i'm grinning ear to ear. i'm exhausted. goodnight! :)
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| i have sean paul stuck in my head. thanks rachel. |
[22 Mar 2006|08:24am] |
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sean paul. |
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last night was fun. i'm glad the war stopped raging between me and mike. i've been waking up when he goes to work and doing mildly productive things with my mornings. like right now i'm photoshopping a doctor's note to excuse my bajillion absences. haha. hey, you can't deny the productivity in that.
last night we went to bingo. we didn't win but we did come up with a master plan to steal an old ladies identity and run away to florida. well, the master plan was "we should steal an old ladies identity and run away to florida!" but still. watching people flop around from two forties is pretty funny.
apparently word on the street is i'm a cokehead.
yeah!
(yeah! should be read in the way that rocco says it when he's really excited)
i dislike angry drunks.
i do like it already being wednesday.
my friends list posts were all pretty melancholy today.
i hope everybody cheers up.
winter's over! that's something to be happy about!
:)
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| the only good thing about today is that it's bingo night. |
[21 Mar 2006|03:14pm] |
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it's a difficult concept for some people to grasp that some things are just nobody's business. and just because someone tells you one story does not give you the right to broadcast that story all over the world and compare and contrast with other people and what they may or may not have heard. and then furthermore, analyze those stories and decide for yourself whether they're fact or fiction and then run with your decision and sell it off as pure golden truth to everyone you come in contact with. i'm very glad that my personal business, some very painful things for me, have now been spread amongst a large group of people because a few of them didn't believe they were true. that seems fair enough for me.
this is letting go. i am taking one huge step backwards. i'm not mad at anyone. i'm not holding grudges. i'm not even going to allow myself to get upset over this anymore. i will be here. waiting. ready to be friends with whoever is mature enough to look past the gossip and rumors and overdramatization of this entire ordeal. even if you were a part of it and now you're over it, i'm still here and willing to be your friend. i like everyone. i think this is obvious or i wouldn't have started a friendship with you to begin with. i'm willing to overlook all of this because it's really nothing more than drama.
my goal was to completely separate myself from the life i built with sam. i wanted a new group of friends and reputation that wasn't attached to "sam's girlfriend". and i succeeded in doing that. but the second i detached myself the old group, the rumors began. and maybe that's just a natural thing. at least that's what i'm going to allow myself to believe because i don't want to look back on any of those relationships with a negative connotation.
thanks for being in my life when you were.
thanks if you stuck with me through all of this bad mouthing and nonsense.
and thanks if you want to be my friend in the future.
that's the best i can do right now.
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| the only people i truly enjoy are rachel, rocco, and elie. |
[21 Mar 2006|12:08am] |
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hey, i thought i should let you know in case you aren't in the really cool haverhill circle of friends: I LIED ABOUT BEING BORN WITH A CANCEROUS TUMOR THAT I HAD REMOVED ONCE WHEN I WAS TWO YEARS OLD AND THEN AGAIN WHEN I WAS TWELVE. I DON'T HAVE TWENTY-FIVE STITCHES ON MY FOREHEAD FROM THE REMOVAL PROCEDURE AND I DON'T HAVE ABOUT A TRILLION PICTURES OF MYSELF AS A BABY WITH THIS WRETCHED ORANGE TUMOR ON MY FOREHEAD AROUND MY HOUSE. MY MOTHER NEVER MAKES JOKES ABOUT HOW I CAN'T GO TANNING BECAUSE OF SKIN CANCER AND I REALLY JUST FELL OFF MY BIKE. ALTHOUGH THE FALLING OFF MY BIKE THING PROBABLY ISN'T BEING CONFUSED WITH THE TIME THAT I FELL OFF MY BIKE WHILE HANGING OUT WITH ALICIA NOURY WHEN HER MOM USED TO BABY SIT ME AND I FLIPPED OVER THE HANDLE BARS AND SPLIT MY CHIN OPEN AND I HAVE A 8-STITCH SCAR THERE AS WELL. I DIDN'T SKIN MY ARMS AND LEGS AND GO TO THE FIRST GRADE BANDAGED UP FROM IT. I REALLY JUST WENT BACK IN TIME AND FAKED SKIN CANCER WHEN I WAS AN INFANT.
you got that?
good.
just thought you should hear it here first.
okay now seriously: eat a fucking dick.
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| i hate fairly odd parents but rocco always makes me watch it. he's asleep! wtf! |
[20 Mar 2006|04:02pm] |
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( give me dude fire. )
matt sadewicz has all of the really good pictures on his camera that he needs to get developed. i can't wait to see all of the burlington pictures and the picture with the giant ape. i'm feeling better this afternoon regardless of the fact that i found out a bunch of my "friends" are shit talking me on a pretty consistent basis and i have no idea what i did to deserve it. whatever. i'm done with taking things personally. people just like to hear themselves talk.
me and rocco are going to salem to go shopping now.
first i'm going to make us an awesome lunch.
eliezer the laser, where are you! i was going to invite you and rachel to lunch.
if you read this, give me a call or something.
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[18 Mar 2006|02:16pm] |
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another note to self: don't ever date anyone again. i absolutely despise every ex boyfriend i've ever had.
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| give me dude fire. |
[17 Mar 2006|05:29pm] |
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note to self: go on more road trips, try to sneak into more countries, hang out with/meet more punks, slash more tires, drink more beer, eat more pizza out of dumpsters, accept that the people in your past were there for a reason and regardless of why your relationship deteriorated, accept them for what they were and what they meant to you and be strong enough to move on without having to forget.
leaving for the road trip part two momentarily.
life is so good when you just stop caring.
edit: another note to self: realize that there are always going to be people that think they "know" you and they'll always tell other people what you're "really like" but don't let what they say confuse who you know you really are. people like to talk. people like to feel like as if they know all. but they don't. and you shouldn't let what they say affect you. do what you do. don't get distracted. have fun. do chix.
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| dear rachel, |
[10 Mar 2006|10:41am] |
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happy 18th birthday to my best friend on the planet.
ilu so much babygirl.
i know things have been kind of crappy lately but i'm really happy that you are eighteen now and we can go to strip clubs and canada and have all kinds of "adult" fun. haha.
i don't know what you plan on doing today but whatever it is, i hope you have a ton of fun.
and if you liked drinking, i'd have had the world's biggest hotel party ever for you.
bff! happy birthday! :)
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| the heart of rock n roll is still beating. |
[09 Mar 2006|10:20am] |
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huey lewis and the news. |
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life's good. friends are good. it sucks that people have to talk about other people beind their backs though. i wish people could just be up front about things. if you don't like somebody, you should be the one to tell them. they shouldn't have to hear it from anybody else. but you're probably not telling that person to their face because you have no legitimate reason not to like them. it just makes you feel cool to put someone else down, more than likely because of the way they look or dress. "fuck normies. fuck hipsters." right? lame. good people are good people any way you look at it. stop being a dbag. it's pretty hard to feel like nobody has your back sometimes. especially when you'd take the bullet for them any day of the week.
the hills have eyes with mike tomorrow. i'm excited.
joncon vs. bastek drinking competition saturday. i'm more excited.
spring break begins monday.
at least i have things to look forward to.
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| fat albert is so inspirational. |
[06 Mar 2006|05:46pm] |
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fat albert singing! |
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i really need to go shopping. wearing ripped up jeans and sam's dirty old wife beaters really isn't very attractive. i think i'm going to the global threat show in allston tonight. it's always fun to get tanked and watch the boys punch everyone for a few hours. the ICC is tiny so it should be a good time. andria and i just got through watching the fat albert movie and writing my history paper. what a productive afternoon. i'm going to make us lunch now and then try to get in contact with mike or elie and see what everyone's up to tonight.
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| hold up. wait a minute. |
[05 Mar 2006|02:12pm] |
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it's too quiet in here. |
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drugs are bad. fun, but bad. you know what's awesome? liars. me and sean just woke up. it's two in the afternoon. i could sleep for days in his bed and pajama pants. i missed the play that i was supposed to go see at some point in the last three weeks. i'm pretty much screwed. i'm sure i'll work my way out of it. i have to bring corey his phone soon. i want to go get lunch. i think sean fell back asleep so i'll wake him up and hopefully we'll go out for food.
things to do today:
1. write my four page modern world paper on the resistance towards european intrusion in western asia.
2. review calculus topics i've forgotten since the beginning of the semester so i don't fail my make up exam.
3. stop being such a shithead and get things done.
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[03 Mar 2006|03:41pm] |
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so much for the party tonight. which is pretty cool considering my brother is getting the room for everyone and i was supposed to be getting everyone alcohol too. plus, my car was bringing a fair share of people. most people will say it was my own decision not to go but that's hardly true. some other people have made it pretty clear that my attendance would be an issue. i don't want to cause problems for anyone else. just sucks that i have to miss some of my best friends birthdays.
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| why do fat girls get all the boys? |
[03 Mar 2006|11:38am] |
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rugrats with rocco! |
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"come on alyssa. just let me explode his face."
hahah. tonight should be good.
i came home and did calculus homework first thing in the morning. that's clearly a foreign step in the right direction for me. then i'm going to bring rocco to school with me and take an exploring the universe quiz and make up a calculus test. yikes!
once all of those horrendous things are out of the way, i assume we'll come back to my house and get ready a little bit, head downtown to meet up with elie and mike, then head out for the hotel party whenever everyone's ready.
oh i'd also like to say that me, rocco, and karl spent about four hours playing the mexican train game with dominoes on mike's kitchen counter last night. everyone was trying to offer me beers and such but i refused because i was having too much fun playing with dominoes at one in the morning on thirsty thursday. clearly i'm the coolest kid around. did i mention the night before that i got so drunk that i stood up and took one step and fell flat on my face into mike's table and woke up with blood all over my face and no idea why? hahah. yeah. i rule that much.
late!@
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[02 Mar 2006|02:57pm] |
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reminder to self: don't date little boys. ever. i swear i'll never date anyone under the age of twenty again. or maybe i should just stop dating people in general because people are fucking insane. maybe it's just me but i could never talk to some people the way they talk to me just out of pure respect for our past. but some people just don't respect and i guess that's the problem. it's pretty fucked up that i'm sitting here crying when i was perfectly happy ten minutes ago. i was well on my way to writing all of my papers that i needed to and doing my calculus homework so i could catch up in school but now i'm back on the same road that made me fail school last semester. i hate that i allow him to have such control over my emotions that i can't even function and do the things i need to do because i'm too fucking upset. people are really messed up. and i deleted that entry not because i give a fuck about her feelings getting hurt but because you asked me to and i respect your wishes. would you have done the same for me? not a fucking chance. then you go and call me a "maniacal bitch". this is fucked up. that's all i really have to say.
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| i love the new powerade water. |
[28 Feb 2006|11:53pm] |
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vh1. |
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tonight is the best i've felt in quite awhile. i'm just always happy. it's becoming absurd at this point. i like everyone around me and the fact that i can sit around a little kids table playing dominos and watching walk the line and drinking flavored water with them. getting tased in the knee caps is no good. this is the first night i've slept in my own bed, in my own pajamas, watching my own tv, in weeks. it's really not so bad but i could never go back to doing it every night. i wish someone would come over and bake cookies with me in their pajamas and we could watch true romance or mindless television just to giggle at. why do i feel so overwhelmingly content? i wish i could share the wealth. my friends list posts have been a bit melancholy and redundant.
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| i don't think that you know what you've been missing. |
[24 Feb 2006|04:32pm] |
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tbsinmyhead. |
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i wake up in a different bed practically every morning. i am very okay with this. i drunkenly fell down matt's hill last night and slit my wrist open on a piece of bark. conclusion? i'm awesome. i wish everyone around me was as happy as i am. it's hard to watch good people struggle to keep their head above the shallowest of waters. hey lush, have fun. it's the weekend.
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| jerry springer is poetic genius. |
[20 Feb 2006|11:19am] |
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just when i think i forgot why i didn't want to be in a relationship these days, someone always comes along and reminds me just in time.
to all of the controlling boyfriends of america, i thank you from the bottom of my heart.
the point is, i'm hosting lunch at my house today.
probably around noon or one.
if you want to come over, give me a call or contact me somehow.
i'll make you a good lunch and we can watch a movie too!
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